Sorry for not writing much on the last few days. I'm doing ok, just seem to be costing along.
Not alot of meaning in my life. Every that seems the same. I think alot has to do with the weather,
and that I'm a out doors person. Being stuck in side all the time makes me down. Any way,
had a chance to work with a cool artist named  Carole Bersin. http://www.raggeddogwalls.com/Bio.html

We painted in the lobby of my building.

I need to do more stuff like this. It helps me feel good about my self. And I enjoy it.

Peace

     This may seem lame, but I had some stuff going on that I need to talk about. I'm realy tired though, and need to sleep plus time to think about what to say.    Did you know your life is what you think it is!

New bike and cooking class

Well I got a new/used bike to day. I hope to be riding as soon as the weather is nice. I need to lose some weight and enjoy riding so it will be good for me. Also I feel at peace when I riding. I enrolled in a cooking class and start in the morning. That should be fun. The first thing we are making is home made bread.Yum..
I really don't know how to cook all that good, so I should get a lot out of this. I have an empowerment group I go to also. Right now we are talking about the subtracter,dividers, adders, and multipliers.These are diffrent types of people and what they bring to your life. Some are good (Adders, multipliers) and others not.I'v been to one sofar and it was good. I'm out of hear...Peace

Slow and easy

Not a lot going on right now. Spending a lot of time going through some paper work to put away.Stuff seems to add up if you don't stay on top of it. Also have been trying to organize my photos. I seem to have copy's of copy's  and it slow going through them all. One of my friends called last night drunk, and I got a chance to hear what I must of sounded like. I know I'v called a lot of people drunk and don't even remember. Sorry if you were one of them. Any way good night. Peace

Low batterys

Well this is what happens when your cam runs out of juice. This cam go's through alot of batterys. One set a day so far.

Target

I had to go on the bus to 3 Targets today. Man what a mess. I spent most of my day mad and really wanted to drink! I hate that feeling. I had wanted to buy a Canon Power Shot SX150 on sell for 99.00$ but down town Target was sold out and Lake St Target sold the one they I put on hold till today. Man did that piss me of. I ended up going out to one of the stores in the burbs to get it I must of spent 4 hrs on that BS...
Any way its a nice camera and its money I will not be spending on alcohol. Well I'm sure know body wants to hear any more of that so good night and Peace.  

New appment

I will be moving next to 402. Its a lot bigger and I have more windows for doing my art work. I'v been feeling pretty good and need to keep make sure I don't let that go to my head. I use to think that if I am doing good I should reward my self. But my brain thinks a reward is to go get drunk. Messed up thinking, I know. Me being aware of that before hand is part of my relapses plan. And to go talk with my sponsor. Any way on my way to work on some computers have a good day every body. Peace

On my way to a better day. I"m feeling good today. Had a rely go meeting last night. And seem to be more focused this morning I have a lot of time on my hands and need come up with some plans to use that tome up. If I stay still for to long. I will start to worry and think about old shit. That will get me in trouble fast.I also need to work on staying on track. I have a way of wondering off easy. Or just plan forget what I am supposed to be doing. Peace

Hi every body I'm feeling better after going on face book and seeing all to people i know.
Was feeling alone for a bit.Kind of hard for me to not have people around me. When I was drinking I had alot of other people around me to hand with and drink. Kind of sad really  I know from my past I will have to gain trust bake.....man hope it (trust) comes some time soon (:  Peace

Not feeling good today. I slept late and stayed in all day. Feeling kind of blue but don't know why? Will be going over to my sponsors house on Sunday for a big book meeting. Should be good. Any way thats all for today folks. Peace

Man was it cold today. I didn't want to go to pc for people today. Then I got there early and had to wait out side for 20 min till some one came to opened the door.I guess we have some big wigs coming by to check out the place in the morning. Maybe we will make the news? My place is starting to look good and feel like a home. I have been putting a lot of time on making it comfortable, but it is worth it. My head is really hurting and am going to bed. One more day down sober. Some one I look up to? That would be my sister. Even though she had a hard life, she still raised some good kids. Looking at my life I have not really had any male role models in my life. Any way Peace          (Me and my Dad before he passed)

I keep looking for something and never seem to find it, so even know what "it" is. Any body else ever feel that way?Kind of like my craving of something and not being fulfilled afterwords. Right now I want a Coke but I know that I'll want something else as soon as I'm done drinking it. That's life I guess. Any body that knows some one poor that is looking for a computer...send them to pcs for people. That's were I work at. Computers for 50 and laptops for 150 plus internet for 10 to 13 a month. You have to have proof that you meet the guild lines for low income. Peace

Not much to say after hearing about Mindy McMready. What a bummer.... Peace Mindy...

Had I good day, went to  a meeting at a church close by, and then came hope and had a late supper. Tacos are the greatest food ever! I'm behind reading out of my Big Book need to keep up on that. I'll read some tonight before I go to bad. My sponsor gave me a big rug for my place to day that was nice of him. My place has cement floors and get cold in the morning. Well my friend came over to talk before he gos to bed so I'm out of hear. Peace

Well I had a good slow day. Nothing major going on. I guess that can be good.
Have a good night every body Peace

Higher Power

Was at a meeting tonight and we were talking about the step 2 came to believe that a power greater than are self could restore us to sanity. Got me thinking about a time I was alone and in pain. I was living under a bridge and it was raining. I got down and cried out to god that if. He was real. He would give me some rest and faith. I guess it was not the right time, for I am now just starting to feel at peace.

Slow day worked for a bit and came back home. I thought I had to be home at 2:15 but it was the wrong day and I left work early for nothing. I some times wonder what its like to be normal? Is there one.
What do normal people do with there free time? Same things I do, or some normal thing I no nothing about? Man do I need to go to sleep. See Ya     Peace

Sorry for not putting this link in. Its a program to count your stop smoking days but will work for any thing.
www.dedicateddesigns.com

What would we do with out coffee? Good morning, hope every one is doing good? I found this cool program  to keep track of how long you have not smoked and also how much money to have saved. But you can also put in other dates like I did. I put my sober data and smoking data in. Just a reminder on my desktop to look at. Lots of snow up North. I know a lot of people up there hope they are ok. Have a Doc appointment today so I will miss my normal AA meeting, but maybe it a good chance for me to go to one I have not been to. Hope so. Don't like it when you first go to some place new. I feel to alone. Peace

Had a really good day with some friends  Bought one of my friends breakfast and BS some. Then went to my Saturday night meeting with my sponsor and another friend. Went out to eat after and they surprised me with some gifts for my apartment  Cool beans. Any way also got some meds for my back pain. Hope they work better than what I was taking.Was taking Zanaflex but it was know good for me, am now taking Ibuprofen 800 mg. I have used them before and they work good. i still have to much time on my hands and want to be doing some thing all the time. I don't feel right, like I should be doing something but don't know what? Almost like i'm waiting for some thing to go wrong in my life? Any one else ever feel like that? Any way this was at my friend Joels house in Tenn 3 years ago. He gave me this goat but i had to leave it at his place. Don't think I can have one at my place. His name is Jerry (:    Peace

Lots of time to think about my life. Where to go from hear, and how do I get there? Most if not all of the people in my life that I love will not have any thing to do with me. I'v pushed them away by going to prison plus being a really bad drunk. I know one thing I feel good being sober 60's and will have many more. Peace

Well I had good day. Stayed home and rad out of the Big Book. I'v been trying to read some every day, but don't always remember to. Should put  reminder on my phone. Ya I think I will do that now.I have my computer running my TV and I have to say it's cool.I can see what I'm doing now.  My friend came over with his brother and watch a movie. Kind of nice to see them sober for a change. I'm working on the one brother to come with me to some meetings. He was sober when he first moved in hear, but with all the people drinking up hear at the time it most of been to much for him, any way I'm working on it, but need to keep my self safe too. Good night...Peace

Had a good day. Dont feel so blue and all. Had a friend over for supper and a movie  That was cool. Most of the time he is drunk so I cant spend any time with him. I'm trying to get him to go to a meeting with me. Any way one more day sober. Be 60 days soon.  YeHa  Peace

Had a long day and my head hurts. Skipped my meeting and am going to bed.Peace

Hows ever body doing? I was out of touch for a bit. I started working for PC for People and it has got me behind on all my stuff. It's a good thing that I work, but I need to remember to keep life in balance  or I'll burn out and want to drink.I'm kind of watching the supper bowl. Not a big fan but like the TV adds. It's been cold hear and so have not been out much. Should be better latter this week I hope. I got a 30 day bus card so I can get to meetings more. Good news for me. All the meeting have been close to my house and I'd like to find some other ones to see if I like them any better? I'll  see what happens. Any way good night and sleep well. Peace

Long day

I had a long day yesterday. Went to two AA meeting and a doctors appointment, plus my morning group @ St.Stephens. Not use to doing a lot of stuff yet. Wore me out, came home and went right to bed. Peace

  

The Blues

Kind of under the weather to day. I stayed up late, and slept in.
This depression stuff really bits.I don't like the ups and downs at all.
Talk't with my sponsor for a bit, that seem to helps some. Any way
 time for bed and hopefully sleep. Peace

Had a nice time today. The weather was good and went for a walk with Pete one of my sober friends. Also went to my Saturday meeting and went out to eat with a bunch of the guys after it. I had my first guest over to my house tonight. That was kind of strange.Other then that not doing mush else, kind of under the weather to night for some reason  Light headed with some anxiety in there also, need to go to bed I guess and quite thinking for a change. Peace

Well  another day over. I stayed in all day and did a bunch of house work and paper work.

The photo above is is a photo of my daughter and her mom,sisters. She is top left. About 12 

in this photo.She is one of the things I lost because of  my drinking. I pray she has a good life.

Dose any body go to meeting ? Would like to get some info one any good ones close to me.

South side would be good. Thanks. Found a copy of the AA book 12 x 12 in PDF formation the net.

Saves me some money from not having to buy it. Well its 10:16 time for me to rest and read before

I go out for the night. Peace. jeb 

Kind of a slow day for me. I went to group today and discussed "The Four Agreement's" by Miguel Ruiz.
http://www.toltecspirit.com/  I spent some time going over his work and like it alot. I plan on reading more from him.
Also got inhold of some AA friends and am going to have some rides set up. So I can go to more meetings and not
have to take the bus al the time.I still think about drinking alot and how it makes me feel. I need to find some stuff
to keep my mind off of it.Hard for me to do when my whole life has revolved around drinking away me feelings.

Peach

Well its going to be some time before I get the hang of blogging.
But any way. I went to St. Stephen's Out Reach to-day for group.
We have group @ 9:30 to 11:00 am 4 times a week.
Talk about things to do to help get your life on the right track.
Lots of housing info also. At 11:30 I volunteered at
Feed My Starving Children. Cool place I will be going back at
least once a week. Check it out @ www.fmsc.org
I also will be starting to volunteering a PC for People a bunch.
I start my orientation on the 29th. I will be repairing computers
and other computer work? Any way it 11:09 pm need to go to bed.
Sober 43 days now...

Hi my name is Jerry Blake and I'm a drunk.

This is a blog of the steps I'm taking to put it back in order.